How To Be A Good Overnight Guest
How to be a good guest
So you are going to be a guest in someone's home. Depending on how short or long a time you'll be there, these tips could help you in your relationship with your hosts.
1 - Don't come across as needy. Don't be that clingy, needy, talk-their-ear-off guest who doesn't read the social cues of your hosts and dominates their time and attention.
2 - Look for ways to help out that will bless your hosts. Always take a little time first to notice the atmosphere of the home, the emotional status of your hosts and listen to what they are conveying to you throughout your stay.
Some hosts would enjoy a hand in the kitchen and some would rather you chat with them as they work. Be available but not pushy. If your presence seems aggravating then find something to do that will help you find peace and your peace will make your hosts happier because it will show the host that you can be comfortable without having to be entertained.
As you spend more time in the host home, you'll begin to get a feel for the needs and can ease in as you are welcomed to do so.
3 - Take times to leave the host home to give your hosts a needed time to be themselves. Your hosts can only relax when you are gone or occupied or in your own room. Leaving from time to time - even if you excuse yourself to go to your room early with a "Hey, I've got things to do tonight - see you all in the morning" - even if you don't have much to do - take the time to read or do something and your hosts will appreciate it.
4 - Don't make your hosts your only resource to get you from point A to point B. If you can find others in your life who can help lighten the load off your hosts by giving you a ride or help get things you need - this would help. Many hands make light work and the more friends in your life who can share in needs you may have is a good thing! And even better, learn where the public transportation is and use it whenever you can. Or walk. People weary quite quickly and the more you can do for yourself, the less you'll wear out the folks in your life who care. Save the extra-special needs you may have for times when you truly don't have the means. All the littler ones, try to meet yourself.
5 - Contribute monetarily for your own needs. Bless the hosts as your means allow. Even add a dessert to go with dinner or ask if they need anything here and there.
Sometimes if you ask if your host needs something, they may often say no. Look for a little something to add to the meal if you notice they could use something. Restock their favorite juice or buy a baked good. Again, be sensitive to the hosts and watch for their social cues. Bless where you can. If money is not an option, write a note, offer to do any chores. Again, don't feel pressured but get the feel for what is needed and when the time is right, give a helping hand.
6 - Try to keep your opinions of your hosts lifestyle to a minimum. Your hosts lifestyle will most definitely be different from yours. Just be yourself and try not to focus on the bad or different. Keep your focus on your goals for your current situation.
7 - Never bite the hand that feeds you. Don't be aggressive towards your host and assume you know what they are thinking or be paranoid. Some of those behaviors can come in life through rejection and issues you may face internally. Don't assume everyone feels like you may be feeling. Many hosts open their home to those with needs because they've been in your shoes and feel compassionate and desire for you to have a safe place to be able to transition toward independence and stability.
8 - Don't get comfortable where you are at if your invitation to stay is short-term. Unless you have spoken to your hosts and arranged a certain amount of time and/or are paying rent for a room - ever be working on getting on your feet and independent. They are your hosts and not family caregivers. Remember this difference no matter how nice and kind your hosts are.
9 - Always be working toward being independent of people. Learn to take care of yourself and nurture your emotional and mental well-being. Use time wisely to work toward getting a job to provide for your necessities. Be stable at that job and get there on time and do the work required and do it well. A regular paycheck provides a home and pays bills. It provides you with much-needed independence from others which is all part of becoming a healthy human being. Dependency on others can cause behaviors that aren't healthy. We become codependent and put up with more than we should mentally, emotionally and physically or we dish out more than we should. Read up on healthy responsible adult living and learn to change your habits so your internal character and destiny can change. Don't hide behind religion or mental illness or past abuses. God has a good purpose for your life. Find out who He is and believe His best for you. Live loved.
So you are going to be a guest in someone's home. Depending on how short or long a time you'll be there, these tips could help you in your relationship with your hosts.
1 - Don't come across as needy. Don't be that clingy, needy, talk-their-ear-off guest who doesn't read the social cues of your hosts and dominates their time and attention.
2 - Look for ways to help out that will bless your hosts. Always take a little time first to notice the atmosphere of the home, the emotional status of your hosts and listen to what they are conveying to you throughout your stay.
Some hosts would enjoy a hand in the kitchen and some would rather you chat with them as they work. Be available but not pushy. If your presence seems aggravating then find something to do that will help you find peace and your peace will make your hosts happier because it will show the host that you can be comfortable without having to be entertained.
As you spend more time in the host home, you'll begin to get a feel for the needs and can ease in as you are welcomed to do so.
3 - Take times to leave the host home to give your hosts a needed time to be themselves. Your hosts can only relax when you are gone or occupied or in your own room. Leaving from time to time - even if you excuse yourself to go to your room early with a "Hey, I've got things to do tonight - see you all in the morning" - even if you don't have much to do - take the time to read or do something and your hosts will appreciate it.
4 - Don't make your hosts your only resource to get you from point A to point B. If you can find others in your life who can help lighten the load off your hosts by giving you a ride or help get things you need - this would help. Many hands make light work and the more friends in your life who can share in needs you may have is a good thing! And even better, learn where the public transportation is and use it whenever you can. Or walk. People weary quite quickly and the more you can do for yourself, the less you'll wear out the folks in your life who care. Save the extra-special needs you may have for times when you truly don't have the means. All the littler ones, try to meet yourself.
5 - Contribute monetarily for your own needs. Bless the hosts as your means allow. Even add a dessert to go with dinner or ask if they need anything here and there.
Sometimes if you ask if your host needs something, they may often say no. Look for a little something to add to the meal if you notice they could use something. Restock their favorite juice or buy a baked good. Again, be sensitive to the hosts and watch for their social cues. Bless where you can. If money is not an option, write a note, offer to do any chores. Again, don't feel pressured but get the feel for what is needed and when the time is right, give a helping hand.
6 - Try to keep your opinions of your hosts lifestyle to a minimum. Your hosts lifestyle will most definitely be different from yours. Just be yourself and try not to focus on the bad or different. Keep your focus on your goals for your current situation.
7 - Never bite the hand that feeds you. Don't be aggressive towards your host and assume you know what they are thinking or be paranoid. Some of those behaviors can come in life through rejection and issues you may face internally. Don't assume everyone feels like you may be feeling. Many hosts open their home to those with needs because they've been in your shoes and feel compassionate and desire for you to have a safe place to be able to transition toward independence and stability.
8 - Don't get comfortable where you are at if your invitation to stay is short-term. Unless you have spoken to your hosts and arranged a certain amount of time and/or are paying rent for a room - ever be working on getting on your feet and independent. They are your hosts and not family caregivers. Remember this difference no matter how nice and kind your hosts are.
9 - Always be working toward being independent of people. Learn to take care of yourself and nurture your emotional and mental well-being. Use time wisely to work toward getting a job to provide for your necessities. Be stable at that job and get there on time and do the work required and do it well. A regular paycheck provides a home and pays bills. It provides you with much-needed independence from others which is all part of becoming a healthy human being. Dependency on others can cause behaviors that aren't healthy. We become codependent and put up with more than we should mentally, emotionally and physically or we dish out more than we should. Read up on healthy responsible adult living and learn to change your habits so your internal character and destiny can change. Don't hide behind religion or mental illness or past abuses. God has a good purpose for your life. Find out who He is and believe His best for you. Live loved.
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